Chapter 269: Awakened

gender-neutral, people of all genders can wear them.But one can still see a glimmer of menswear.Mr. Xu looked at Jian Tong as if he had seen a ghost, sizing her up carefully... This Jian Tong, there...Bai Yuxing and Xi Chen didn't know what kind of emotions Jian Tong was feeling during her solitary time.

When the door opened once more, it was Shen Xiujin's turn to be rescued again.

In the corridor, hurried footsteps echoed. With every rescue attempt, everyone held their breath in anxiety.

Jian Tong was like forgotten, everyone's attention was on the man receiving emergency treatment.

No one spoke until evening, when the doctor finally announced that the crisis had been temporarily averted.

But this was not the end. For five days and five nights, as she made her way to him, a sense of impending doom hung over his head, just like during this near-death experience.

Five days and five nights, eleven times.

She counted, each rescue, a number added to her heart.

She didn't know why she did that.

She didn't even know if she had the strength to continue harboring resentment towards him in her heart.

She couldn't even understand herself, how could she possibly understand Shen Xiujing.

That was a morning, a morning with a hint of hope.

She kept watch by his bedside, having grown accustomed to sleepless nights staring at his blood-drained and emaciated cheeks. She watched silently until even she could no longer bear the fatigue, yet dared not drift into deep sleep.

When night fell, she sat by his bedside like that, gazing at the face so familiar that she would never forget it in her lifetime. Sometimes she would stare until she was lost in thought, a wicked idea lurking in her heart—if he died, she would be free.

Every time she thought about it, about him dying, about him leaving this world, the pain that surged within her was almost unbearable.

Even she herself couldn't tell, whether she was hoping for him to stay alive, or hoping he would just never wake up again.

"Don't you hope he wakes up" Bai Yuxing asked her through gritted teeth.

She couldn't give an answer.

"If he doesn't wake up, won't you hurt here" Bai Yuxing excitedly pointed at his own left atrium with his finger, questioning the woman who didn't shed a single tear.

Yes! It will hurt! Almost before she could think, her soul cried out deeply: Yes! It will hurt! It hurts so much!

"I've tried many kinds of pain before," she said, not knowing if Bai Yuxing understood or whether she was saying it to him or to herself.

I've tried many kinds of pain, tasted many flavors of it. You ask me if he'll feel pain when he doesn't wake up. Yes, he will feel pain. But that's all there is to it. Pain after pain, it's all numb now.

Yes, numb. She kept telling herself over and over again in her heart. It seemed that way she wouldn't feel the pain. But how could she not feel this heavy air, suffocating, breathless: "I'm going out for some fresh air."

Bai Yu held his fist tightly behind her. He had no right to blame her, yet he resented her coldness and ruthlessness.

But if she were cold and heartless, for several nights running, she refused to leave his bedside, watching over the man lying there.

Bai Yu xing silently turned his head, looking at Shen Xiu jin lying on the bed.

……

Late night

This was the only night she slept peacefully.

So exhausted, he lay at the edge of his sickbed and slept.

She was woken up by a commotion in the early morning.

When I opened my eyes, the bed was surrounded by people.

She first saw Bai Yuxing and Xi Chen facing her across the bed. Only, the expressions on their faces were so excited, as if they were looking at... She followed their gaze to the hospital bed... Suddenly!

Pupils suddenly constricted!

She just stood there, her mouth agape, staring blankly at the man on the bed who was winking at her.

Blinking eyes

Suddenly, I woke up! All the sleep bugs in my head vanished at once!

Shen Xiujin, woke up!

Her heart was filled with joy, but the next moment she realized her boundless happiness. A wave of self-disgust washed over her... Why be happy for him

Why should I be happy for him

She projected her self-disgust onto him, turning it into words and attacking the past:

I didn't shed a single tear for you. I won't cry for you.

At that moment, everyone glared at her in unison. Xi Chen gritted his teeth and said angrily, “You’ve gone too far!”

"He just woke up, and you're already saying things to provoke him Do you really want to make him angry" Bai Yuxi followed closely behind.

When the simple fairy tale was finished, she immediately regretted it but refused to show weakness. She didn't say a word of apology, stubbornly pressing her lips together in silence.

Suddenly, a voice:

"Big sister, do you hate me" A deep man's voice, yet filled with grievance and sadness, like a wronged child.

Jian stared blankly at the man on the bed, his face full of grievance and sadness: "You..."ize them for a week and then hand the notes to you.”You ended up gathering dust in a forgotten corner of the bookshelf.My grandfather taught me personally, but you have this same thing that I have!But...